So you're hearing from me pretty early because there's no school today. How weird... no school on a Tuesday. I wish school was every other day... but I guess then we'd have more homework, which I haven't done any yet...
You know... I think I'm a lot happier at home. I'm sick of school. Somewhere along the way, school lost meaning to me. I just like the fact that a few of my friends are there and so I get to talk to them.
I never feel like myself, or perhaps I feel too much like myself, because I don't know what it means to feel like myself anymore. I don't know what the norm or the average is because things are constantly changing. It's not really a bad thing, but still... I just don't know what to expect anymore I guess. *Sigh* I'm sick of trying to write meaningful entries.
On the other hand, I had a dream last night. It was about a guy who I was dating. I had no idea who he was, but I don't think I knew him anyway. He was really tall... the only thing I remember was feeling frustrated. I dropped my lab notebook and the papers inside were ruined and torn apart... things from my binders fell out... then another scene when I'm trying to climb over this step (like a stair), but it's above my waist. I'm having a really hard time climbing it and my boyfriends stands at the top kind of smiling, but it was more of an encouragment than mockery, but I felt... I'm not sure how I felt. A part of me felt annoyed that he didn't help me and another part felt good that he was encouraging me.
Actually if anything, the dream reminded me of a real life version of Yuu... he had that charming suave thing going on. Then when I do climb over, he's not there, acutally, I'm in a totally different place. Filled with mountains, volcanos, lava, and other various weird sceneries. And the only other thing I can remember is I wanted to cuddle with my boyfriend...
Another reason why I dislike guys, they make things harder for me, even in my dreams...