I'm so glad it's the weekend, a 3-day weekend because I really need this break. This week has been, to say the least, long and stupid. And I hate the fact that I have a bunch of homework and the truth of the matter is, I really don't want to do any of it. I wish I could run away and forget it all. And I'm so tired of thinking because it's all the same things to think about and in the end, I have no conclusion.

I'm constantly reminding myself to go with the flow, but it's only half working. I go through a series of thoughts, and then I remember that I shouldn't be thinking about this subject and that I should just be going with the flow. I am so dreading my report card and as far as I'm concerned, it can burn in hell. My mom called me and she asked if anything was wrong and I knew I couldn't tell her. So I lied. I'm so glad she's not here right now, because I don't know how I can possibly explain to her how I got such a low gpa this semister. Right away, I know that she would constantly bug me about my school work for the rest of the year and I know that she would make me work harder. Worst off, she would make me feel so bad, and I would be so stressed, more than I am so now... so I've really got to get my ass off and start working harder. I feel so bad... she seemed really concerned and she asked me if things were okay like 3 times and each time I lied, I felt even worse.

My friend says that any gpa higher than a 3.0 is considered pretty good and generally accepted by most UCs and Cal States, but I don't know, I'm still so disappointed in myself. I'm just gonna have to pass the AP exams. I have to. Okay, I'm just gonna go now... I never know what to think or expect anymore... *sigh* I'm so sick of everything that's around me.