My mom has been really bugging me about what school I want to go to once I graduate and stuff. All this shit really pisses me off. I can't stand it when she says that the choices I picked for colleges are unacceptable because the schools are too easy to get into. She wants me to go to UCLA or some school that's as good as that and she won't settle for anything less... I've never liked UCLA because I don't know... I just never have. Everyone wants to go to UCLA and I hate following trends like that. What sucks even more is that UCLA is too close to home, she'd want me to live at home, I'll bet and I don't want that. I don't want to live at home, fuck that. The whole point of going to college is so I can be away from home! She's defeating the whole purpose!

I haven't been feeling too good about the things that are going around me lately...

I snuck out last night and now I kind of regret it. Don't worry, I didn't get caught, but I still wished that I hadn't gone. I felt like I made an ass of myself and I acted like such a bitch to Fyto... well, I was a lot worse to other people, but still. I did get a small moment to talk to Fyto where I was civilized and I think that Fyto realized that I was angry at myself, at least I hope he realized it. My attitude had nothing to do with Fyto. I wonder if the mood swings had anything to do with the fact that I was PMSing. I never thought that that kind of thing affected how I felt at all, but lately, I'm beginning to think otherwise. I kind of feel like I've been having huge mood swings. On Saturday I felt like I was in love Fyto, and then Sunday night, or early morning rather, I felt back to normal. Something's up with my hormones and I'm all out of whack. I wish it would stop because I'm sick of this. This is spring break; it's the worst week to be PMSing.

I don't even want to study for my AP tests, but I really fucking need to. I can't stand this. I wish it was May already. I'm so tired of this.

I wish Fyto would call. I want to talk to him. I don't think we're going anywhere tomorrow, even if that was brought up. He thinks that he might be coming down with the flu. I wonder if he's anything like Chris. I guess if he is, he's either gonna go through tomorrow without calling at all, or call at the last minunte and say "come over." I perfer the first one, because I don't think he's going to call me just to say we can't do anything. It's more than a hunch. Why do I fall for these guys? But you know... Fyto is not Chris, that I know for sure.