Well, it's pretty late and I had to restart my computer twice now, because it kept freezing on me. How annoying! Grrr... I was reading some other people's diarylands, and I came across a pretty nice one... this one entry especially made me laugh, you gotta check it out.
Anyway, I got my retainers today. Gosh, they feel weird. The top one is real tight, but the bottom is real loose. It's kinda annoying. I don't think I did too well on the AP bio test today. Each day I feel shitter and shitter. I acutally felt like I got something accomplished today, playing the viola. Finally... about time. Although, it was real funny when I took a break and I beat Ricky at pasoy (I don't konw how to spell), this card game. Then I started hitting him with that bottle. Ah... that was nice. That's what he gets for forcing that initiation crap on me. Did I tell you about that? Man, Chris has come up with some wacky (well, it's not really wacky, this IS Chris we're talking about) idea to have initiations. My choices were to 1-get beaten or 2-get fucked. Nice choices, huh? So then they were like "choose one, choose one!" ... so I was like "okay, I choose to get fucked". They haven't fucked me, and I don't think they will. Plus, he said that if we got fucked it'd be in front of everyone... no way am I doing that shit in front of people... though I must admit, it'd be nice to kiss Chris again... ~:cocky smile:~ Sorry, can't help it. I'm not sure what messages I am getting from him, actually. Well, then again, you call that mixed messages, don't you? He's IMing me again, and yeah, that's actually a big thing considering he used to go "what do you want?" when I IMed him first... but then, he was mad at me at that point, but I don't konw. Sometimes I know what he is thinking, but I still get these mixed messages. I am so confused... why can't things ever be simple in life? Oye...
I was thinking of getting my dad to let me join this stupid club again. Well it's not really stupid I guess. If I join I get 12 CDs for like 23 bucks. I already know 7 that I want. SOAD- Toxicity; Incubus- Morning View and Make Yourself; Nine Inch Nails- And All That Could've Been [Live], The Fragile (2 CD set), and The Downard Spiral. God, I want that The Fragile CD!!
I think I got something for Josh Hartnett... ain't that weird? He's like the guy that I promised myself I would never like because I always thought he was ugly, but now it's funny, I don't like him, but ever since I remember seeing that movie, Pearl Harbor, and I started connecting his sexual behavior with whomever else I knew, I started thinking that Josh Hartnett is as horny as all of them and somehow that actually turned me on. Haha... I think that's a first... weird...
Man, I still miss Chris. It's like weird, sometimes I don't know whether or not to take things for granted. When I do, it doesn't seem as cherished, but if it isn't you, you remember what happened and you kind of regret that you took it for granted and you miss how that was... it's like that, sometimes I wonder if I should've taken it for granted, and I guess, in a way, it's a good thing I did, I could look back carelessly about it.
Hmm... I guess that's about it. You know, it's funny, when life is crazy and being shitty on me, I just keep rambling on and on and I won't shut up, but life is being okay on me now and I just tell it like it is, and in most instances it's pretty boring how life is... *sigh* What to wish for? I know...
-RoLe ModeL-
...Wish I was something real,
wish I was something true...