Well... First off, Eric had to work so he couldn't go. Secondly, Andrea and her cousin didn't hang out with us at all. I picked up Andre cause I didn't know how to get there and then when we arrived we saw Nancy...
At around 10am, we called Andrea and she was barely getting her ass over here and we had already gone on a lot of the rides. We decided that it didn't really matter that we hang out with her because it seems that everytime we're with her she leaves us for other people and we realized that it would happen again, so we just decided not to even try to stay together. Bummer... (not really).
It's already Wednesday... that gets me really depressed. I'm halfway through my housesitting gig, my applications for my private colleges will be due soon, and don't forget about the homework I have to do. I'm not looking forward to doing any of these things. I would work on my applications right now, but I can't get Eric out of my head. I'm so worried about us because before he left to work on Monday, we were talking about prom and we got each other angry and I haven't really spoken to him since. He left me some instant messages on AIM Monday night about how he was sorry, but I really need to talk to him about this still.
This "problem" has been on my mind since yesterday. At some points, I felt like I was gonna go crazy and then on some other points, I made myself forget it all so it wouldn't be so bad to take and then I would totally lose my feelings for Eric as well and I wonder if that's a good idea - turning off my feelings for Eric. What if I can't get it back? But I am tired of this constant worry, it's really annoying.
See what guys do to me? Is this normal? Am I being totally compulsive-obsessive? It's only been one day technically. But one day without him feels like a week, especially since I used to talk to him everyday for hours at a time. I'm not completely insane. Tell me I'm alright. I just miss him so much. I really cannot think straight right now and I don't want to do something stupid... and that makes me worried about Eric. What if he does something stupid? Does he feel the same way I do?
You know what would be good for me right now? A distraction... because thinking about this... it's making things worse. So, I'm going to go to the library and then I'm going to Ms. Royer's house, watch a movie or something... And then Eric will be online (he's working right now). If he doesn't come online tonight... I don't know what kind of crazy, irrational thing I will do tomorrow. I just hope I don't do anything stupid.