06.19.05
#983 - Post Mick wrap up

randomlayout / my designs

greed

lust

pride

I think life is weird right now. I kinda feel like I'm stuck in limbo. Nothing seems to be decided and... I don't know where I'm really going in life. Perhaps this is the side effect of graduating... which is on Tuesday... only 2 more days. I'm not scared, but I'm not exactly brave either. I guess, I'll deal with whatever comes.

I still haven't recovered from my lack of sleep. I'm always so tired and I don't like that... oh well. I'm having money blues right now because I lack money. *sigh* My paychecks aren't really getting bigger and... oh I dunno what it is that I want.

I dunno why I even decided to write in here... I guess it's my way of stalling sleeping, which I really need. I just don't understand myself. Suddenly, it seems I've built myself up in a state of sadness while I began to write in here.

I don't think I'm getting with Mick, or at least that's what I would've said if I had written this yesterday. I had a weird conversation with him today and it seems he's infatuated with my liking him. That seems kinda obnoxious I guess, but for some reason I find it flattering. I don't quite understand it. He asked me indirectly if I would make out with him. I don't think I could do that without getting feelings involved and I don't want to end up with my feelings and my hurt over what was supposed to be harmless making out.

He was just being horny I think.

He's like that a lot. I really enjoy and appreciate the air of honesty between us and I hope that doesn't stop. I guess it was kinda awkward tonight, but I'd rather have the honesty with the awkwardness than pretending the feelings aren't there or it doesn't exist. I don't quite understand what's going on and I think he's just confused. I'm about 90% sure that's the case, but the other 10%, I can already feel myself getting my hopes a bit and that bothers me. I hate that. How annoying. I hope it goes away, because... I dunno, I don't feel like Mick and I would work out as cute/hot as he is.

*Sigh*

Enough of this bantering. I'm going to bed.


sloth

envy

wrath

gluttony