I'm starting to supress my feelings again and taking it out here. This worries me in a way. I'm not sure writing everything here is a good idea... because diaryland is not a real person.

All my junior friends, well they're seniors now I guess, are having all these loads of fun without me and I feel quite left out. They're in summer school so in a way, for them school hasn't even ended. It scares me because I know they're having all this fun without me... I mean, I'm not stark ravingly jealous. I'm not angry at them. I'm just a bit... disappointed. They don't really think of me that's all. I just wished that they would call me to hang out and stuff, but they don't. They just... hang out with each other. They don't think of me... And that gets me sad. I feel like they don't want me there... and then I don't want to call them up or talk to them anymore, because I get scared I'm bothering them. I just don't know. Why won't they even call me? Did they want me out of their lives that much?